Riggins (to Lyla): I love you.
Lyla: What?
Riggins: I love you.
Lyla: How am I supposed to react to that?
Riggins: Brutal honesty. Please.
Lyla: It’s never gonna happen
Riggins: What is this? The Christiansen guy?
Lyla: No.
Riggins: Or what? You can’t tell me that you share whatever we had with this guy. You can’t tell me that he knows everything I know about you. You can’t tell me that. I don’t believe you. Be honest with yourself for two seconds look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t feel the way i feel about you and then i’ll move on.
i don’t fee the way you feel about me. Move on.

Radio guy: I’m gonna take this one for Lyla cause it’s her first day and I have to admit it’s a little early in the morning to be defining intercourse.

Landry: You’re not sleeping with the hot maid are you?
Matt: Kind of.
Landry: Are you serious?
Matt: Yeah, it’s kinda cool.

Tim (as Tina): This is Tina and I’m from Waco. And I”m kind of embarrassed saying this but, I mean, I think Jesus was hot. ‘Cause he’s so hot. He kind of looks like a movie star.

Eric: One of the reasons that you and I gave up that job down at TMU is that so you didn’t have to give up your job. You’re a damn good mother. You’re a damn good counselor, and you’re a hell of a hot wife. I wa just inside on the computer, and you know what I found out?
Tami: No I really don’t.
Eric: I found out that separation anxiety is completely normal. WE get over it. I also found out that certain studies suggest that children who go to daycare, actually, it helps them socialize. In years to come, it turns out that daycare screwed her up, she’s always got you for counseling.
Tami: You’re funny.
Eric: We stick together, it all works out.

Lyla (Ti listening in the car on the radio): You know, Rita? People are gonna make fun of people at school for whatever they can get their hands on. But most importantly, you gotta be true to who you are. There’s a gospel song “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.” And it doesn’t just pertain to spreading the word. It pertains to you. To the truth that lives inside you. Don’t hide that from teh world. Tell the world how you feel. Let your light shine.
Tim: Damn it, Lyla. All right.

Tami (to Eric about Gracie): She didn’t even turn around and look at me. I think she’s totally over me.

Tami: Well, she’s driving me crazy.
Eric: She should drive you crazy ’cause she’s crazy.

Coach: Got any concept about personal property?
Shelly: Yeah.
Coach: You know, like how about personal private moments in the privacy of one’s personal private space?

Tami: And she was here for a long time.
Eric: You’re damn right she was.
Tami: And it will be nice to have our house back.
Eric: You’re damn right it will be.

Eric (on Gracie to Tami): That is not our burden, that is our gift.

Julie: It was my fault. We are at this party and I was drinking and there was this other guy named Riley and I was about to get in trouble, and Tim stopped it, and he took me home, and he was trying to sneak me in, and then you came in and I’m just trying to say it was my fault.
Eric: Damn, Julie.
Julie: I’m sorry.
Eric: Damn.

Coach: I jumped to conclusions. I’m well aware of what happened the other night. I apologize. i was wrong
Tim: That’s fine
Coach: No is not fine. I couldn’t have mishandled it any worse. And I apologize. Last couple weeks, I’ve been giving you hell, and not once have you come to me and complained and then you got where you’re protecting my daughter and you’re not letting me think bad of her, and again you don’t say a word. Not a word. And I’ll tell you something, not as a coach, but as a father, you realize what an honorable thing that is. That is very honorable.
Thank you, sir,

Tami (about Tim in the house): You know what? I don’t necessarily think this is gonna work out so well.Let me tell you why. Having that Riggins boy here with our 16yo daughter,it’s like putting a can of gasoline right next to a lit match.

Tami: I am made of Christian charity

Tyra: Hey, will you hand me one of your napkins that you’re hoarding over there?
Landry: I got, like, four napkins. Don’t make fun of me because I’m neat.

Well, you know, they may not even be good enough for your wife but they’re good enough for a state championship last year.

Lois: Tim Riggins was like holding you?
Julie: Like, holding me. Like, protecting me. Not like, “Oh, I love you.”
Lois: What does he smell like?
Julie: No. Really, Lois, that’s…That’s, like pathetic. Like here’s you and here’s pathetic. You’re, like, going below yourself.

Tyra: Some douchebag named Chip. Who names their kid Chip anyway?

OK, Landry, I don’t know if you know this, but I’m a virgin. So I don’t know where you get your info from, but it’s wrong.
Landry, you got a date for the dance yet? Cause, you know, I hear Matty’s granny ain’t doing nothing.

Tami: Frankly, I worry about you. I really do wonder why it is you just refuse to grow up.
Shelly: Well, I can tell you why. “Cause then I might end up just like you.

Coach: You ever, I mean ever, touch one of my players again, you will never coach another football game as long as you live. Do you understand me? And after that I will kick your old pirate ass six ways from Sunday, Donald.

Tyra: I just need a little time to figure things out. Does that make sense?
Landry: No, it doesn’t. It doesn’t make sense at all.YOu know I’m…I’m really sorry about this, too. The thing is I know that you’re better than this. Better than the girl that has to sit over here alone because her date is too stupid to stay sober for one night. I know that you’re better than that. The thing is you don’t. I don’t know what I have to do to make you see that. I don’t… But I can’t just keep waiting around until you finally realize it. I can’t. Because I’ve tried. I’ve tried to show you that. I don’t know what else to do. So..so have a good night.

Riley: I think I’m like maybe one beer away from getting laid.
No kidding?
Yeah
Nice. That’s great. If you ever look at her, even tonight again, at school, any time for that matter, I swear to God I’ll end you.